The Duel of Fates: Mental Vertigo

*Sigh* It's raining again......

And the rain accompanied me on my morning drive...even as I cried.

I think I cried. It feels more like a vertigo...like my mind is swirling.

A.P. said I should be exhausted. I probably am and ignoring it.

I'm dizzy. I guess 8 hrs of sleep in 72 hours will do that. Even if you remove the Batman equation I have seen, heard, and discussed enough to deny any man rest. I do believe it is safe to say I am "deliriously exhausted".

I should be home again sleeping. I've canceled most of participants post tests. I really cant listen to whining of snarky teenagers who don't want to work. Conversely I am sure they don't want to deal with a grouchy old man whose pissed he cant get his woman back, who's sons are irking him to death and whose job is acting reeeeaaalll slow.

Of course I can't sleep. I have an interview in a hour and a half. I am so unprepared. I am wondering how many redbulls I am going to have to suck down to get up to 40%.

Walking down the hall to my office is errie. It seems like the door keeps moving out of reach. All of my co-workers seem extra today and they wont shut that fucking FM radio off. Is this love song morning? What the hell?

Did I say I'm dizzy?

One of my more adoring and adorable co workers ask me if I have been crying. Damn, I think the swag shades would hide this. I tell her more than any normal person should and smile.

Four site visits this afternoon. I'll end my day in the field.

Phone rings. Oh joy more love advice.

I swear the next *points at you all* mofo that asks me if "she is mourning like you; if her life is unhappy like you are" will be kicked in the chest, choked with a plastic bag or have your identity stolen. Maybe all three. Her response doesn't invalidate my emotion.

Oh and I'm praying my son's school doesn't call again.

Is this Friday blues? Who the fuck has Friday blues?

I miss my Batman game......that makes me happy :D

Last night my mother told me to stop blogging for two months. I told her it's my only outlet.

She said write Jehovah a letter.

I'll do that too.....

Dear Jehovah:

You know I don't want to be sad over this
or angry
or hurt
or frustrated

I damn sure don't wanna piss off ANYBODY ELSE...from her to Yan to BFL

But how can I do that and keep emotional integrity?

Please advise

Thanks,

Trying to be your loyal servant in Jesus' name
TLT

I need to get up and head to this interview...my legs don't work...

My hands stopped too....I guess they are tired of the keyboard.

And please don't let my son's school call today. Those ignant coons will get it

And so will he.

I've been a on Burger King kick...shit's so not healthy but that's all I want.

Ugh...it's still raining...

I'm dizzy...

But I want this new job....so I'm suck down some espresso AND redbull...wash my face and go get my shit.

then afterwards I'll find a parking lot, crawl in the back of the van and sleep...

Then come back....and listen to the kids whine.....

and uh....hmmm ramble over.


Straight No Chaser
TLT
8-28-2009
11:45am