"I know there's confusion.
But Jah's gonna see you through yeah.
Peace, AFTER Revolution. But you'll pay tho...."
~ Other Side of the Game
But Jah's gonna see you through yeah.
Peace, AFTER Revolution. But you'll pay tho...."
~ Other Side of the Game
I've always liked the above quote. I always seem to remember it during challenging life defining moments, and the moments in between moments, to let me know that no matter what there will be a positive change, Peace after the Revolution...even if I got pay a little for it.
Peace is a component of freedom and I heard somewhere that freedom isn't free. ;-) In my never ending quest for peace, or at least a permanent peace, I've been forced to pay a few dues.
But the purpose of this blog isnt to wax on about the prices I've paid but rather just to let you snarky mofo reading this that I've been doing ok, each day a little better than before because if nothing else I am a soul survivor and that is what we do.
I've found a certain peace in fatherhood. I can't explain the immense joy I have in being with Snarky Pre-teen and Wild Child. Its funny to see them interact, both possessing my extreme qualities as their main qualities. Its like watching my two sides talk to each other.
The detox (modified) and liquor break seems to help my spirits. Hopefully by the end of this process I will have gone back to my diet of only fish and poultry, with the eventual move to only fish, then vegetarian. I've neglected my diet for some time and I think as embark on everything else I might as well put that in order. My lunch of Caesars Salad, tea and rice affirms this shift.
I am continuing my journey towards Jehovah, and I admit its harder than I expected. My pride, in conjunction with starting this walk with a faith level of like 1.5% makes letting go and letting Jah difficult. I am trying though, and I am well aware of the counsel found at Hebrews 13:7 "...who have spoken the word of God to you, and as you contemplate how [their] conduct turns out imitate [their] faith." In essence I need to be minded on this walk that what I say and how I act will be monitored. As real as my emotions and feelings are, even at their lowest, I cant allow them to not properly reflect a man who is walking towards and will one day be a complete Christian man. I am being watched, esp by my suns and I need to make sure I am at best even when I am not.
I need to also repair the rift I've created with BFL. I was chastised for my cold behavior towards them yesterday by a number of people; the truth is they are working diligently to help me out of the darkness, help me combat this new creature. I can not disrespect a ten plus year relationship by scapegoating them.
Well that's it, I'm going to finish watching Star Trek and enjoy my day. I'll most definitely let all know when my teaching scores arrive..
Pressing forward and answering the bell
Straight, No Chaser
TLT
5-17-2009
9:07am
Peace is a component of freedom and I heard somewhere that freedom isn't free. ;-) In my never ending quest for peace, or at least a permanent peace, I've been forced to pay a few dues.
But the purpose of this blog isnt to wax on about the prices I've paid but rather just to let you snarky mofo reading this that I've been doing ok, each day a little better than before because if nothing else I am a soul survivor and that is what we do.
I've found a certain peace in fatherhood. I can't explain the immense joy I have in being with Snarky Pre-teen and Wild Child. Its funny to see them interact, both possessing my extreme qualities as their main qualities. Its like watching my two sides talk to each other.
The detox (modified) and liquor break seems to help my spirits. Hopefully by the end of this process I will have gone back to my diet of only fish and poultry, with the eventual move to only fish, then vegetarian. I've neglected my diet for some time and I think as embark on everything else I might as well put that in order. My lunch of Caesars Salad, tea and rice affirms this shift.
I am continuing my journey towards Jehovah, and I admit its harder than I expected. My pride, in conjunction with starting this walk with a faith level of like 1.5% makes letting go and letting Jah difficult. I am trying though, and I am well aware of the counsel found at Hebrews 13:7 "...who have spoken the word of God to you, and as you contemplate how [their] conduct turns out imitate [their] faith." In essence I need to be minded on this walk that what I say and how I act will be monitored. As real as my emotions and feelings are, even at their lowest, I cant allow them to not properly reflect a man who is walking towards and will one day be a complete Christian man. I am being watched, esp by my suns and I need to make sure I am at best even when I am not.
I need to also repair the rift I've created with BFL. I was chastised for my cold behavior towards them yesterday by a number of people; the truth is they are working diligently to help me out of the darkness, help me combat this new creature. I can not disrespect a ten plus year relationship by scapegoating them.
Well that's it, I'm going to finish watching Star Trek and enjoy my day. I'll most definitely let all know when my teaching scores arrive..
Pressing forward and answering the bell
Straight, No Chaser
TLT
5-17-2009
9:07am
No comments:
Post a Comment